Welcome, as I Disappear


Poof! (note that I have just poof-ed and emerged from thin air) Why, hello there. 

Below you will find a poem that I had just written 2 days ago. This is a not-so-adequate-but-meh-it-is-okay-enough representation of one of the oldest thoughts that had been crawling in my mind since as long as I can remember. Since I was 16 years old? 13 years old? Heck, since I was in primary school, even. Never felt belonged, no matter where I went to. Questions like 'Who am I?', 'Why are they talking to me?', 'Why are they not talking to me?' or 'Is this my place?' could be quite overwhelming for a mere 12 year-old-girl. 

I've never been good with words, at least orally. Finally coming to the age of 20, I figure that I should be able to put these thoughts into something, you know? Something readable, understandable. So, yeah, here you go.


I float around
Like ghosts at Maghrib,
I stop by places
leaving breadcrumbs
Just like Jack and Jill.
Waited there for moments
before a new season comes,
I search for new resting spots.

I leave those breadcrumbs
knowing that they will be eaten
by the Birds pecking on the ground
Gnawing at my holes-filled soul
The Trees look around, wondering
where did she go
I disappear, that’s what I do.

When a new Season comes by,
I will come back
To feed the birds
With stale breadcrumbs,
Living to their old expectations
Before I disappear again
And the feathers fall over my fading tracks.
Funny, eh? How can we be so silent but our minds so loud?
-tom

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